KnIghtly Knews

It has come to my attention that the reason people fail to achieve their goals has very little to do with a lack of ability but everything to do with a lack of persistence. I need to find a binding track that will force me along to where I want to be. Without that, I believe I'll find myself far too content with the status quo. I'm getting my ass in gear once my lungs work again. In the mean time, I'll try not to procrasterbate while my life needs to get started. The real world never hits... It's a void unless you fill it with something. Problem is I don't have thing that I believe in enough to fill it with. Aside from the constitution and sympathy and empathy for those without opportunities...

Typing all of your thoughts as fast as you can has a theraputic propoerty to it. now ionly if i could type fast and sccurate. and as fast as i could think i would kick osome serious ass in everything. not only arem y thought slinear, but theiry aloso sequential, usually following the format of an outline without needing one. this is the cauwesed by me writing so long ont using wrtiten outlines and iinstead writing off the ltop of myhead. problem is i write even shitteir than i type.

Is there any merit in being a good person? I don't think that it's a common compliment, that "You're the best person I know." but it's one I've recieved on multiple occasions from multiple people that I have known for long periods of time. And what do I have to show for it? a twisted sense of humor, a spoiled tone, poverty, and a shattered and arrested confidence. When will freedom and independence reign?

One day I will get in touch with my inner drive and wants. And I'm actually afraid of the animal I will become when that happens. I can sense my capability for it. Luckily I have a soft spot for sympathetic stories and underdogs, but in the right environment I can become a horrendously brutal calculating monster. I hope that whenever it does happen, It'll be in an environment where I will be forced into actions that are beneficial to the system.