I am writing this at the very end of week 3 and the beginning of week 4. I have been taking painkillers far less now and can actually focus a thought or two. Lately I have been hit by an anxiety attack of sorts due to what I believe are two potential blood clots in my left arm. Now that I'm off the painkillers, I noticed how much pain my left arm is in and am able to pinpoint the pencil erasure sized lumps. Week One Every thing is agony. I feel like somebody stuffed a cantaloupe into my hip and stabbed me for the trouble.There is a constant dull pain coupled with a sporadic burning sensation. The upper potion of my right leg is massively swollen. I can hardly sit, stand, fart, turn, crutch, or even laugh without feeling like I'm being stabbed and bludgeoned at the same time. I'm bruised all around the bandages all the way to my knee, my dick, balls, ass, and lower back. I can't push my piss out, and I can't really sit on the toilet never the less excrete. I ...
It has come to my attention that the reason people fail to achieve their goals has very little to do with a lack of ability but everything to do with a lack of persistence. I need to find a binding track that will force me along to where I want to be. Without that, I believe I'll find myself far too content with the status quo. I'm getting my ass in gear once my lungs work again. In the mean time, I'll try not to procrasterbate while my life needs to get started. The real world never hits... It's a void unless you fill it with something. Problem is I don't have thing that I believe in enough to fill it with. Aside from the constitution and sympathy and empathy for those without opportunities...
Life sucks... then you die:) A good attention grabber for the subject isn't it? With a quote by Vince McMahon as a base point, how bad can life really seem? Let's explore this topic for a bit... The last thing many people say they have is their health (of course not when they're dying) I've never had this. Compared to the grand scheme of things I'm pretty sure I would have died a long long time ago as an asthmatic baby. So what is the worst that can happen to my health? I have lungs that work part time, a sleep cycle less consistent than an electron, hip flexor injury that just won't go away, creeping depression, and likely some sort of inferiority complex when it comes to doing anything with real worth. How much worse can it get? I've seen how bad life could be. Families crippled by medical debt, which honestly scares me more than my own demise. Asthma so bad that they're bed ridden and totally foreign to the world of physical activity. Real...
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